My McDonald’s Job Interview

When I was seventeen, I had a job interview to be the French fry cook at our local McDonald’s. Here is an excerpt from that interview:

McDONALD’S: Were we to hire you, Mr. Bekkala, would you ever help yourself to some of the French fries you were being asked to cook?

ME: I like French fries! What, you don’t like French fries?

McDONALD’S: My question is a specific one: would you ever—

ME: Do I like French fries? Yes, I like French fries. Any maybe I’ve taken some I wasn’t technically entitled to, OK? What, you haven’t?

McDONALD’S: Mr. Bekkala, what we’re trying to ascertain is—

ME: I know what this is all about. This is a hit job, plain and simple. This is a calculated hit job intended as payback for my having worked the shake machine at Burger King. That’s what this is!

McDONALD’S: Back to my question: would you ever help yourself to some of the French fries you were being asked to cook?

(silence)

McDONALD’S: You’re not going to answer the question?

ME: I like French fries, OK? We all like French fries. Yes, occasionally I have eaten too many French fries.


(Now the crazy thing is: They still hired me.)

BILL