Tuesday, December 8, 2015

On The Lighter Side of Killing Sprees

I take comfort knowing I will never be shooter or victim.

I’m non-violent, have a moral conscience, vent as needed and am not into guns. Best of all, I’m agnostic! OK, that’s the shooter part.

But what about victim, you ask? Hey, I read beyond the headlines. The victims are usually “Kimberly Ann was 24, cheerful, loved by all and was two weeks shy of her wedding day.” It’s never: “Bill was bullheaded, opined with irritating frequency on the issues of day and his black gallows humor repulsed many.” Sorry, kids, but I’m going to be the lone survivor, feigning a corpse while staring into space amidst the bodies, sprawled out atop an empty ketchup bottle.

BILL

Twitter: @BillBekkala

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