Sorry if I seem frazzled today. I was up all night trying to reassure some of my straight couple friends that their marriage is still solid. This did little good, however, with my old Kentucky pals Cletus and Thelma Lou, both of whom got liquored up with moonshine - upon hearing yesterday's US Supreme Court rulings on gay marriage – then grabbing cousin Zeb’s shotgun just before hanging up on me.
They haven’t been returning my calls. I am not optimistic.
BILL
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